Archive for January, 2006
I’m Impatient…So F*%kin’ What?
It’s 2:15. I have a cold that came out of nowhere so I’m miserable. I left my ATM cared at home so I can’t go get any medicine. I have a ton of work to do today. I texted myHero an hour ago to ask what time he is coming in the AM and have […]
Recognizing my Right from my Right Now
Women who act the way I have in this past relationship feed into the men who act the way myHero did. Seriously. Let’s face it. I may have wanted to think that I was “being strong” and “sticking by my man” during a time of adversity, but let’s face it, I was enabling him to […]
Ball of confusion
I am scaring myself at how well I am still handling everything. I have had a few down moments, but far from the dysfunctional mess I have been worried I could become…or at least prior to the appointment. I have a few things going on, and I am finding stress in general is hitting me […]
Well damn!
Here I go being happy for #48 about proposing to his girlfriend. I think “Great! He’ll finally settle down with her and be happy ever after.” Sure they had their problems in the past but what couple hasn’t. And sure we had our past, but that was eight years ago, and we’re not romantically in […]
Life changes for different results
You know, some people say that when God speaks to them, they know it. It happens in the same way every time. For me, it happens while I am asleep at night. I wake up in the morning and I just know what to do. It used to be a little scary because I didn’t […]
Weekend recap
The weekend overall was good. I had some ups and some bigger ups. No real downs, per se, just the lingering fact. I am counting the days and they just aren’t coming fast enough.
My best friend #48, called me Saturday. He’d actually been calling me all week but I hadn’t felt like talking. I knew […]Heartless or just plain numb
I’m inclined to believe that for the moment I am numb to the whole situation. Knowing that I am far from heartless by any means, this is the only conclusion I can come to. I don’t hurt; not mentally anyway. I’m not sad or upset or dysfunctional; but I am not myself either. I don’t […]
And another thing…
Get off my damn blog!!! You have been stalking my damn blog for months. For what?! If you fuckin’ choose to stay with him, why do you keep reading to see what he’s doing with me? Since I posted about being pregnant, you have been here over 15 times…in 3 damn days. If you want […]
An alternate quest
Last year when we broke up the first time, I took it the hardest. It seemed to come out of nowhere and the excuse he gave me was bullshit. I knew from jump something was up and it was my digging that unearthed the fact that She was very much still in the picture in […]
I could cry and stress, but what’s the point
I got myself into this mess, so I’ll be the one to get myself out. That’s been my motto for many, many years, until I got with myHero and learned how to let a man do for me and fell a little too hard off that motto. Anyway, I am well back on tract with […]
