Archive for July, 2005
A new chapter begins
Lil Hero is here. He arrived yesterday afternoon. My excitement surprised me. I am very, very happy for myHero as crazy as that sounds. The ‘woman’ in me is happy for him. He has a baby now, how can I not be excited? The ‘mistress’ in me can’t figure out why I should be excited. […]
The winds of change are upon us
They are inducing Her labor today. The baby will be here shortly. And I am having a million confilicted feelings. Of course I knew this day was coming, although it is just a few days earlier than the due date, but I guess I just couldn’t have prepared for it.
I want everything to go well […]The (un)Importance of a Title
For as much that is wrong my relationship with my Hero, I see ten times more right. Taking a step back from the main fact that She is still living with him for just a moment here:
When I need…he is right there.
When I fall…he picks me up.
When things look down…he motivates me to keep looking […]Secret Lovers
This weekend, I realized that I am actually enjoying our love being “a secret” so to speak; at least from my friends anyway. We were all sitting around this weekend analyzing some of our love lives or lack thereof and as I was listening and occasionally putting in my two cents, I kept hoping that […]
Would it be such a surpise if it doesn’t work?
Sigh…I am starting to have my doubts about AD. It not anything he has done, per se, more of what he hasn’t done. I let the “dating” thing slide because he was having some issues. I can appreciate his honestly, hell we all have issues. But when you develop a pattern of only calling or […]
Fallout
It still amazes me after almost a year of being together, that the words that my Hero says still affect me the way they do. I don’t know what it is. Not so much that what he says is law, not by a long shot. But he can apologize or explain something and I just […]
Who said “truth hurts”?
In the week leading up to our trip, for some reason, I’d been full of questions. Honestly, I was and still am proud that I have reached the point where I don’t fear posing questions to my Hero, and look forward to the answers, whatever they may be. I love looking forward to the reality […]
A Much Need Mountain Getaway
Needing an escape for a weekend is an understatement to say the least. Although I had just gone a way the weekend before, I was excited about this trip away, alone, just the two of us. We had been trying to get away for about 6 months, first to New York, then San Francisco, but […]
Mentally wandering aimlessly
What do you do when the life you imagined shatters before your very eyes? I always said part if the reson I’ve been unable to leave is because he hasn’t done anything devestating to really hurt me, as crazy as that sounds. With the first breakup, he left without a real explainationa nd when he […]
Silly randomness
What is it about a man that is professional by day, street savvy by night; has that intimidating, thuggish, “I’ll kick yo azz if you mess with my girl” look, and is as affectionate as a teddy bear that is just so damned sexy. Oh yeah, and is technology and electronically savvy too. Oooolawd!
While daydreaming […]
